MHLAS #12

I forgot to send in my update yesterday. You all know what it is like the few days before you go away on vacation. All of a sudden EVERYONE wants something from you and it makes it hard to slack off J AND they are moving my office while I am gone so I'm trying to pack 22 years of "junk" into boxes and still get my work done.

So I’m getting this quick one out before my day really starts.

Weight: Oh I know what it is this morning and I'm not happy with it so I'm not posting it. Doesn't seem like I'm playing the game right but I've dropped out of the weight part of this challenge and only keeping track of the minutes of exercising. That is my focus more than the weight. However, if that number goes up just 2 more lbs - then the weight number is going to have to be kept track of again until it goes back down. Why do I struggle so much in the summer ??? (Nevermind that question, I already know the answer).

I can still work on increasing my minutes of exercising and during my holidays I plan on doing just that.

Week of July 21-27^th:   I did 360 minutes

That’s all I’ve got for right now, sorry for being such a boring blogger lately.

Summer does that to a person.

Have a FANTASTIC day.

Ttyl

Sandra

Oh so tired... :)

I want to eat when I am tired and really need to stay awake. I’ve noticed this in the past. I’ve mentioned before that I will eat in my vehicle to prevent from falling asleep and as a passenger wanting to stay awake so that she can keep the driver awake (sunflower seeds work well).

Yesterday at work, I was very tired, almost exhausted. Could hardly keep my eyes open. Not sure why other than I was very tired from the stress and lack of sleep on the weekend.  What stress you ask? Driving home on Sunday was stressful because the truck wasn’t behaving normal, and we had a slow leak on the back trailer tire. Fortunately we noticed it before we pulled away and I still had some relatives there. My Uncle had a little air compressor and we put it on the tire and tried to pump 80psi into that tire. The compressor broke at 55lbs. It was smokin!

So we got into the truck anyway and pulled it out of the valley and to the nearest town which fortunately was only 30 minutes away. Then we filled it without knowing exactly to what pressure as all their gauges (and our own) only went up to 50lbs. But it was enough to get us home. And fortunately the truck didn’t start fully acting up until just before we were to pull it into the acreage which is where we store it. It had acted this way when we came home from one of the last trips and I had asked Mr. Sandra to get it looked at before this past weekend but especially before this upcoming trip. We  are going through the mountains or what we call the Crowsness Pass and it’s pretty steep up through and back down again. We don’t need any issues on the road.

But he didn’t do anything about it, and it had acted up again on Sunday. I wonder if he will get it looked at before Friday…. I really do not want to have to say "but I asked you XX times to get it looked at before this trip"..... you know that "I told ya so" thing. I hate doing that.

So back to that hunger/tired thing, all I wanted to do on Monday was eat. Didn’t matter what, preferably healthy, like almonds, apples, carrots, etc., just to stay awake. I was reading a manual and was falling asleep – so I took out my carrots. (When I read at night, I want  chips…. Hmmm….)

I am not eating intuitively, I am emotional eating. I am eating because I’m tired, I’m eating to fill a void. I need to not do this as I am not hungry. I’m just doing…

You getting tired of reading about this yet? I’m trying to work through it and I guess I need to get it down in writing. And what better place than somewhere I can get actual feedback J

I’ve tried getting up and walking around the floor when it hits me but I was so busy I hated the disruptions but how productive do I really think I was with struggling with falling asleep. I tell ya, I was doing the head bobbin thing and my concentration sucked. I’m trying to work on new stuff and reading manuals is boring, and put tiredness on top of that, well you have this:

I'm not sure how to deal with this but I have to learn to do it with something other than food. Hard to undo many years of a bad habit overnight but I am sure it will be possible. I just have to find the right replacement. Anyone have any ideas?

Good to note though, when I got home last night, I got on the treadmill and did a jog/walk for 30 minutes, strength trained for 30 minutes and then back on the treadmill for another 45 minutes. Felt great after that... still tired but good.

I hope you have a fantastic day!

Sandra

Family Camping & Exercising on Holidays

We had a great family weekend. There were 38 of us camping, 5 trailers and 7 tents. Lots of dogs for Katie to socialize with and she did fantastic. We looked like quite the little community with all our trailers in a C shape and all the tents behind. The river was too high, running too fast, and was pretty muddy so no swimming in it this year. Thursday night we weren’t too sure what the weather was going to be like as we had a fantastic lightening show for a couple of hours and then it rained through the night. Friday wasn’t too much better to wake up to, cloudy with some sprinkles and then later in the day it started to clear off and we had perfect weather. Hot and sunny for the next two days!

 

We had a HUGE water fight on Saturday with EVERYONE involved. It was a ton of fun! My grandson got right in there as he got to man one of the super soakers and was getting everyone wet. Once he got over the fact that they were going to get him wet back, he started to have a blast. It cooled us off really nice and everyone enjoyed it.

 

I ate OK all weekend. When the burgers came out, I had one without the bun and just a salad. It was all I felt like and I felt good afterwards too. Tummy didn’t get all yucky feeling. I can not eat pancakes and sausages though. I do not know what it is but something gives me a stomach ache. Not sure which culprit is giving it to me. I only had one of each though because I knew what it would do to me. You may ask yourself if I knew I wasn’t going to feel good after eating it, why did I eat it? Good question…. Because it tastes good is not a good enough answer but I have no other. It was a choice and I made it…. Got to figure out something to replace it when everyone else is eating it…. Mostly because I am the one making it for them. I ate mostly fruit for snacks because it was hot and I didn’t want to eat chips. Positive for me.

 

I walked Katie a couple of times a day for about 20-30 minutes each and other than running around in the water fight, didn’t get much more exercising done. I don’t go to my PT sessions this week as she is on vacation so I need to get my own plan together for tomorrow and Thursday night and go there and do my own thing. It’s really easy to just say “I’ll do it at home” and not go to the gym but if I do that, then something is going to come up and my plan will go south. So my plan for this week is to get out walking today, good ole Jillian Michaels Shred tomorrow morning, then to the gym after work to do the muscles I didn’t kill doing the shred. I’ll repeat that for Wednesday and Thursday.

 

Friday we are off for our two weeks of camping. I’ve got my little print outs of what workouts I am going to do with my bands and tubes so the key now is to make sure I do them at least 3 times a week. Otherwise, I will be doing a LOT of walking. I’ve only got 6 weeks left before I do the 100K walk in September and I want some endurance walking done before that. My daughter is coming camping with us and we plan on walking from the campground to the closest town and get Mr. Sandra to come pick us up if we need it. We plan on walking an hour out, hour back, then 2 hours out, 2 hours back, that sort of schedule. Work into 5-6 hours of walking. Problem is, is that it is kind of boring walking that long… but we need to do it. I guess that is why they call it a challenge.

 

I hope everyone is having a fantastic week!

Ttyl

Sandra

MHLAS #11

Holy smokes I must be stressed. Yesterday was downer debbie, crabby Sandra for me. Not sure what was going on in my brain but I wasn't my cheerful normal self. I've really just got to stop worrying about everyone else (spouses, kids, family), as well as job and money, and just start living today. Can't change what happened yesterday, and other than making preliminary plans for tomorrow,  I've just got to do my best right now, and start enjoying myself again. Sorry about the pooh pooh post yesterday :) But I guess this blog is for me and when I review my archives, I can shake my head at myself and say "sheesh, look how much I've improved".

It is time for my weekly "My long HOT Active Summer Challenge" update.

I am still not weighing myself and it is probably a good thing considering my mood.

My weight today is: ??


Exercise Minutes July 14th-20th: 430 (360 Quality, 70 Walking)
 
My minutes are going up again and that is a good thing. I'm off as of tomorrow for another long weekend of camping and I PLAN on exercising even if it is just walking a LOT. It gets pretty hot where we are going so all the walks are going to have to be early in the morning. I work better in the morning anyway.
 
I pick up my grandson tonight as he is coming with us and I'm looking forward to it. Last time I saw him though I caught that nasty cold from him - here's crossing my fingers he is well this time. I leave next week for 2 weeks of vacation (again camping) and the last thing I want to be is sick because I have stuff planned for that holiday. Golfing, fishing, and tons of walking....
 
Now I'm off to figure out a workout plan I can do with bands, tubes and a skipping rope. I workout best if it is planned and laid out for me.
 
Oh and have I mentioned I HATE pushups? Last night was my upperbody workout and she had me do pushups. I am so freakin week in my shoulders/chest/back when it comes to doing pushups. I have always thought I was pretty strong but not when it comes to pushups. They are going to be on my list of must do's for training for camping.
 
I hope you all have a FANTASTIC day!
ttyl
Sandra

No More Excuses....

Yesterday I learned a few things – one of which is that I’ve missed exercising all the time. And I mean exercising in some form every single day. Summer is tough for me to keep that schedule. I have too many things stacked against me – main one is laziness and the people around me – which makes me feel weak like I can’t make my own decisions and do my own thing. When we started camping in June, my weekend exercising almost completely stopped. I will go for short walks with Katie but my strength training or circuit training sessions are null and void. I have dreams of keeping it up while camping, I have tubes and bands in the trailer, small easy to travel with tools so that I can exercise away from home. But I don’t do it (at least not often). Why? I get lazy. There is no other excuse. I get tired of walking on my own all the time, I worry who is going to come walking down the road when I’m outside the trailer trying to do a band/tube workout and see me do it. Why do these people even care? Why do I ?

I remember writing last year that it takes you 21 days to get into a habit and takes me about 4 days to get out of it. Waking up at 4:00 a.m., every weekday used to be a habit and easy to do. I’d workout every single morning then on the weekends I’d also do some kind of strength training/circuit training session (like 30Day Shred or something like that) plus cardio (~2hrs of working out). This year I even started working out after work and was getting in double exercise sessions every other day or so. Then I went camping in mid June. I took 3 days off of exercising and other than strolling around, I didn’t do much of anything. Monday I got sick with cold… nasty horrible cold that lasted almost to today. No energy or enthusiasm to exercise. No way was I getting up at 4, or even making it to the gym for that first week. But then we went camping for 10 days and other than one tube/band session, walking ~45 minutes each day with the dog, I didn’t do much of anything. At least I don’t feel like I did much of anything. Probably because I was still pretty sick and felt like crap most of the time. Then came an impromptu wedding (with more camping), stress for next wedding….. OH and how could I forget BABY!  I went for my ST sessions twice a week but had a tough time getting up at 4 to get on the treadmill. Lately I’ve been busy after work so that early morning workout was/is important.

I’m tired of being tired. I liked how I was feeling before I got sick. I’ve got to get that mojo back AND I have to keep it going through the camping weekends. I’m not sure how to do this when everyone around me does NOTHING and I want to get up and get out there and go for an early morning walk – it is SO easy for me to fall into the “lazy” mode.

I need to find out how I can keep being energetic, living the fit lifestyle when everyone around me lives the lazy one. I have to learn how to NOT absorb the lazy energy around me. And I have to learn to let go of the fact that I’m in this alone. That others aren’t going to change and that I am doing this for myself and get used to doing it on my own.  I have to learn to like to exercise (walk/run) on my own outdoors. Treadmill workout is always there and easily done alone. Outside workouts either make me feel self-conscious (running) or bored (walking). I have to learn to be the person I want to be and not fall into the easy/lazy lifestyle I have been surrounded by my entire life. I also have to accept that I was pretty sick and that didn’t help with my lack of motivation and give myself a break. And there was the stress….  But…. NO MORE EXCUSES.

Loretta – I’ve got to get out of my comfort zone!

I need to learn to live an active lifestyle as part of my natural daily routine.

I’m hoping as of yesterday my mojo is returning….

I also hope you all have a FANTASTIC day!

Ttyl

Sandra

 

 

I can't.....

Expect any other results than what I am experiencing right now. When you reduce your exercising (almost in half) and increase your fat content by the food choices you make, the results are going to be weight gain and overall feeling crappy. I feel like a bloated beluga whale. I’m not being harsh on myself either, it’s how I feel. I ate really badly on the weekend and my tummy is paying for it big time.


Friday night started out with the having the entire family over for a BBQ and we had burgers. It was an introduction to lovely little Lilyana and everyone had a great time. I carried that little girl around with me all night long – well until everyone else took her over. My son was having withdrawals. Nice thing about the evening was that Mr. Sandra’s Son and new wife (they got married last weekend), showed up at our doorstep as a surprise. He wanted to see the baby, his Grandmother and spend the weekend with us. It was a nice surprise.

The next day was the wedding of my step-daughter – you know the one that I have been worried and anxious about because of seeing my EX. I actually got to sleep in on Saturday – probably the very first time in over 5 years that I have slept in until 10:00 a.m.. Mr Sandra got up with Katie for a change. You would think he read what I wrote the other day because as of Friday, he actually cleaned up the house, washed dishes AND let me sleep in. However, Sunday he was back to normal…. Anyway…..

I got to the hall about an hour and a half before the wedding so that I could help my daughter get dressed etc. and take a bunch of pictures. I’m so glad I went as I got to finally be the “Mom” participant in this wedding. Her new mother-in-law came to the hall to drop off things and told me that I must stay for the reception regardless of what the Ex wanted because he didn’t help with the wedding at all. Not one single thing. Had I known that I would have taken on a much more involved role. But it was too late by that time. So when  the girls were ready, the photographer was there and we headed out to the parking lot to take some outdoor pictures. While that was going on her Dad showed up. So when he got out of the truck, I said “Hi” right away (with some more idle chit chat) and he actually smiled and said Hi back – didn’t get out his gun and shoot me.

The wedding itself was very nice, held outdoors in a very nice grassy area. Fortunately the weather was very nice, blue sky with no clouds. Made it hot for everyone but who cares, it wasn’t raining. After the ceremony, there were lots of pictures taken and lots with me in them (I hate pictures of myself). Ex and his GF stayed away, which meant they were out of the pictures taken in that area but it was their choice. When we took the pictures over in the shade, which is where they were, I was right in there taking pictures as well. But I will admit, I didn’t take any pictures of them.

Once that was done, I headed over to the campsite where the new in-laws where hanging out with all their friends, and visited with them. Ex and GF eventually came over as well which I think was a good thing, however Ex left to do something with the kids, leaving GF sitting there and if her eyes could have actually shot daggers, I’d have had a ton of holes in me. Never met the lady before, still haven’t actually met her, but she doesn’t like me. Oh well…. All in all, I think the wedding was beautiful, the bride was gorgeous and they are so much in love and happy it was so wonderful to see. I was so proud and happy for them both.

She would probably kill me to show this picture on the Internet but I am going to anyway. She is beautiful!

After the wedding, I went home to meet Mr. Sandra and the other kids and we went out for Pizza - fattening, filling pizza.Should have stayed at the reception and ate whatever they were having.

Sunday I didn't eat much better. I'm not sure what's going on in my brain but it's being wiped clean today. I got up this morning at 4 and exercised. It wasn't easy to do though. I had an entire conversation in my head before my feet actually hit the floor. I tried talking myself out of it but it didn't work. I got on the treadmill this morning and did a walk/jog session for 35 minutes, then stretched. I'm scheduled for the PT session after work for upper body and more cardio. I'm out of town starting Thursday for another camping family weekend and I didn't want to miss my 2x strength training sessions, so we moved Thursday to tonight instead. I've got to get the exercise bug again......

I hope you all have a FANTASTIC day!

ttyl

Sandra

Look….

What can I say…

This is from Wednesday night when I got to hold her for the first time

 

 

 

.

Then last night…..

So tiny..

 

 

 

 

 

When I went to pick her up, she was eating so I took over while Dad put her car seat and stuff in my truck. When she was just about finished eating, she decided that she had enough and I ended up wearing most of her milk down the front of my dress. Kind of the projectile type…. I honestly panic a tad because she was choking and was turning pretty red…. but she was fine of course. I haven’t held anything this small before and the last time I held a baby was 7 years ago.

She was a perfect little girl last night and just slept until just before her parents came home. I was feeding her when they showed up and when she was done she stayed awake for awhile so that I could continue to hold her. I also got to watch my son with her and he is an absolutely fantastic father – very comfortable and natural with her. She immediately calms down when he is holding or talking to her. It was a very nice evening.

I hope you have a fantastic day…

ttyl

Sandra

p.s., thanks for the supportive comments yesterday – I do appreciate it.

Sweet Bundles, Boredom Eating

I got to hold her last night – finally. I’m feeling well enough that I am pretty confident that I am not contagious. My cough has lessened considerably and the antibiotics have done their job on the sinuses.

She is a tiny, warm, lovely bundle of sweetness and I get to babysit her tonight J Watch for many pictures coming tomorrow.  She has gained a lb since her birth (5lb14oz as of yesterday) and has grown 1.5 inches. She looks healthy and content and Mom & Dad say she wants to eat all the time. I got to feed her last night and watch her fall asleep and I just fell in love a little bit more. Tonight Katie dog will get to meet her and being the protective grandma that I am, I won’t let her too close. Katie will want to sniff her completely all over as she is that kind of dog – wants to smell everything, but she is going to have to do it from a distance just yet. Dad wants to take Mom to a movie and dinner and I piped up immediately that I’d watch her.  I am so looking forward to it.

Tomorrow night I’m having a family BBQ/Baby shower combination. My family hasn’t met her yet so it is a perfect opportunity to have everyone over and meet the little bundle of joy at the same time. Our weather is finally starting to smarten up so the BBQ weather will be good and for my step daughter’s wedding on Saturday. It’s about time ya know!

I wanted to talk a little about my emotional eating issues. Reading the book has really made me aware of when I want to eat and how I feel during that time. I’ve got a ton of work to do to work through this issue and how I am going to resolve it. I eat when I am bored. I’ve mentioned it several times in this blog and I still don’t know what to do about it. I need to recognize it when it happens, and find something other than food to provide me a cover-up for the boredom. I even use food to prevent tiredness – like driving in my car. I have trail mix in my truck to eat when I drive home after work. The drive is routine, boring, and about 45 minutes long. I get tired at the end of the day and almost on auto-pilot. It’s really not a safe state to be in so I munch on the nuts. I “THINK” I don’t eat much but I betcha by the time I’m done mindless eating them, I’ve digested a lot of calories. Yes I don’t want to count calories but I need to still be aware of how much I am consuming.

Late night bingeing/snacking is also a tiredness/boredom prevention strategy for me. I want to eat when I crawl into my bed and read my book and get this – I am reading the “Breaking Free from Emotional Eating” and I want to EAT! Freak! J

 

NOTE: I’ve written the following paragraphs 3 different times and what you are about to read is  what came out of re-wording the first two tries but this time the real issue has come out. Journaling is a good thing.

 

I used to snack on chips every single night when I was a single mother. I was bored and I was lonely. I ate them in bed reading a book or sitting on the couch reading a book. Always reading a book. And then when I was in a new relationship, I would stop because I was happy, content and not lonely anymore. And now that I’m starting to think this through, I’ve realized that it would start up again when my relationship wasn’t what it started out to be. When it became an unhappy place to be, loneliness would set back in, and I would start munching again. When I ended relationship with my ex – I weighed in at 230lbs. For my 5’2” stature, that was pretty heavy.

 

Then along came Mr. Sandra (I was 220 then) and we had a lot of fun in the beginning years of our relationship. We have a lot of similar likes and dislikes, loved to do things together and we would go out and socialize quite a bit. I’ve lost 40lbs over the last 5.5 years but we had to stop socializing so much because that always involved drinking beer and it’s hard to lose weight if you just drink it back on again. But I’ve noticed the munching is starting up again. I will go through phases where I am doing something great like the elimination diet, or trying to eat completely clean, and I don’t munch. I do really well and feel really good – for awhile.  But then I’ll get upset or frustrated with something going on in our relationship (or lack thereof), and start the late night munching again. I have noted though that if I am really upset – like mad – the last thing I want to do is eat – I feel nauseous instead. Anger is not something I like or can handle well. This is just more like a depressed upset – mopey feeling. Mr. Sandra is retired, I work full time. Most of the time Mr. Sandra does not do anything during the day . Unless he leaves the house to work the dog with his friend, or woodworking in his shop at our acreage. It is worse in the winter than the summer.  But if he is at home, he does nothing (unless I leave specific “honey do” lists). So even though Mr. Sandra and I live, sleep and eat together (most times), we spend very little time together when I get home from work or if we are at home on the weekends. I come home I wash the dishes and put the dishes away, make dinner, do laundry, go for a walk with the dog, blog, go have a bath, go to bed early and read a book because I’m bored (and then munch on chips)…. Or whatever needs to be done. He sits in front of the TV, snoozes and gets up occasionally for a cigarette (he can’t smoke in the house). I am bored and I’m pretty sure lonely again. I can’t even get him to come on walks with me and the dog. Even the camping weekends this year – he just doesn’t “feel” up to it…. It’s his Knees you know…. Blah. Even dinner time, I eat at the table, he sits in front of the TV and eats on a tray. By now you are probably asking yourself why am I with this man? Cause I do love him. We do get along really well (for the most part) and do enjoy doing stuff together. As long as it isn’t too physical that is… like exercise (walking – mind you he will walk a river fishing just fine). I’m on my own for this one. And you know… walking by yourself all the time – well it gets boring too and I’m finding lately I don’t want to do that either. It sucks.

I have talked to him in the past about his lack of contribution at home and his lack of motivation. It will get better for awhile, but he always falls back into the “do nothing” mode and it’s a hard one to break out of. I understand that but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating. But it can’t keep going on like it has been for the last year or so or else I may talk myself into ending this relationship because I can’t “deal” with it.

I need to “deal” with it now and stop ignoring the issues and hoping they will fix themselves. I have to stop self-medicating my loneliness with food…..

Well that’s enough blabbering today – I’ve given myself something to think about.

I hope you all have a FANTASTIC day!

Ttyl

Sandra

 

MLHAS #10

I can't believe it is the middle of July already. We have had such horrible weather you would never even know it was summer. Unlike some of you folks, we have only had a couple of really nice days. I'm really missing it as it is hard to get the motivation going to get walking or running outside when it is pouring rain. 

My update for the Long Hot Active Summer challenge is going to change a bit. I've not been weighing myself and I don't plan it for some time. I will weigh for the final week and hopefully I will see a change but right now I am NOT focussing on my weight as much as getting my butt back into gear and working out.

My weight today is: ??
Exercise Minutes July 7th-13th: 305 (225 Quality, 80 Walking)

I'm still not happy with my exercise minutes. I went from being a nut in Apr/May/.5 June until I got sick with this cold (which I still have by the way). My get up and go, got up and left. I've got to catch up with it and tie it to me again. I'm struggling getting up at 4 - in fact my tiredness has been winning and I've not been very successful at getting up that early. I get up at 5 because I have to leave to get to work but I struggle with sleepiness when I get there. I'm not sure why I am so tired.

My strength training workouts have been good. I'm at the gym a minimum of two hours twice a week and I'm working hard. After last Thursdays leg workout, I could hardly walk this past weekend. Climbing in and out of the trailer (up and down the stairs) was challenging and on Sunday we went fishing and we walked a trail that was down a fairly steep hill. I did OK going down, but on the way back, we got separated from the guys so I carried what felt like a 30lb cooler back up that hill.... along with the dog, two fishing poles & net. It was tough. Fortunately we got back to the vehicles before it started to rain or else that hill would have almost been impossible for me to climb carrying that cooler.

The wedding was a lot of fun but a little strange at the same time. It's not every day you party with your BF's first ex-wife and her BF. There were lots of pictures taken with my BF and Ex with newly married couple and us outsiders (Her BF and myself) were kind of left to the side. I did get in the pictures (and so did he) but it was just weird being there on the sidelines. I must admit I didn't like it much.... which I think is perfectly normal. This weekend's wedding is really going to be weird and I'm nervous as heck about it......

I hope you all have a fantastic day.
ttyl
Sandra

Eating on a Schedule

Of course I am reading another book that I picked up last Wednesday. It’s the same author that has been on Oprah quite a bit lately and seems to be the “talk of the town”. I haven’t read her latest book yet but I do own it.  I am talking about Geneen Roth.

 

I bought her older book “Breaking free from Emotional Eating”, and so far, I’m finding it very interesting. I’ve talked about eating mindfully, intuitively, etc for some time and I sort of try to follow that method but sometimes I suck at it. I’m always falling back into old habits as it of course is easier. It’s not easy making life long changes like this but it is something I am going to have to do to let my body get to where it needs to be.

 

For the most part, I don’t overeat, I don’t snack much, and my calorie intake is probably pretty average (under 2000 per day). Mind you, there are some meals that I eat that would be likely almost double of what I should be having. A perfect example would be Sunday night, while in Fernie, we went out for Sushi… and we had a LOT. I think I am still full from that today (if that is even possible).  Anyway, my point is, I don’t plan on counting calories ever again but it is hard to not look at something and decide if I should eat it or not because of the known calorie count in it. Geneen  writes in her book that it is OK to eat whatever I want, whatever I have deprived myself of because I thought I shouldn’t eat it. To absolutely, completely, remove the diet mindset from my day to day activities.

 

But the key is to eat only when you are hungry and decide at that time what you want to eat. I mean, really look inside and eat what you WANT and not what you think you should have.

 

So on the weekend, I took note of a few things: I eat on schedule whether I am hungry or not and if I am cooking a meal, serve it out, I still eat it whether I am hungry or not.  And since I didn’t have to worry about what I was going to eat all day (scheduled snack and meal times), food wasn’t so much on my mind. Now this is pretty easy on a long weekend, away from home, but not sure how it will work during the week when I have to prepare my lunch and snacks for the day. Last night I just basically threw a bunch of fruit and veggies in my lunch bag and will go from there. But I am a prepare ahead lunch and snack making gal and there really isn’t any spontaneous decisions there. I’m eating what I think I want, or will want, and or should have… like fruits, veggies and salads. I guess if I find that come lunch time and I really don’t want what I packed, I can always go to the store and get what I need…. I’m not sure how this is going to work.

 

I’ve still got most of the book to read but so far I really like what she says because it is getting me to think through some stuff before I put anything in my mouth. She wants you to journal everything, which I do to a point, I guess I just need to journal more for awhile.  I may even move the notes to here so I can get feedback….  I plan on reading the book all the way through, then starting at the beginning and using out some of her theories.

 

So to start for today, in the mornings I normally come to work and make my protein shake (Shakeology) first thing (to be eaten by at least 7:00 a.m.), so that I can have my next scheduled snack for 10:00 a.m.. I’ve eaten like this forever – by the clock. So this morning I thought I would wait until I was hungry. And by 9:00 a.m. I still wasn’t hungry but I did make and drink it anyways as I was going into meetings and I didn’t want it to hit me while it would be impossible for me to get anything.

 

This could be an interesting journey.

 

I hope you all have a FANTASTIC day.

Ttyl

Sandra

Weddings....

I’m off tomorrow and Monday. We are going to Fernie, BC to go camping with a little extra special occasion thrown in for tomorrow. Originally, I had booked three nights at this very lovely campground outside of this lovely mountain town.  Then a couple of weeks ago, when we were camping and Mr. Sandra’s son and fiancé came to camp with us, things changed a bit.

 

Mr. Almost Step Son asked his GF to marry him on Christmas day. They are very much in love these two. She is however from Japan and was here on a working Visa and is now on a 3 month visa (can’t remember what type). Her current visa is so that they can get through the paperwork for her to permanently stay here and they marry. Part of the visa application is to prove that you are actually a couple. Pictures, letters from us, that sort of thing. They came with us to Mazatlan in May and called that their honeymoon.

 

Well her father is here until Saturday and he wanted to see them marry, so while were camping, they picked a date. That date is tomorrow.

 

So I’m taking off another day of work, getting up early tomorrow morning, picking up our trailer, and heading out for a lovely 3.5 hour drive. It truly is wonderful country to drive through and very pretty. They are having it in their backyard and I know it will be one big party. I’m looking forward to it. We will be doing lots of fishing if the rivers and creeks are normal. One of them includes a 5K walk down to it, then 5K back up the hill at the end of the day. I remember the first time I did that walk and coming backup, in waders and boots that were too big, well let’s just say it was very difficult for me. The smokers did better than I did. This time, I think it will be different J

 

Next weekend is my Step-Daughter’s wedding. I’ve talked about this one before. Her father didn’t want me to go to the reception in case he got drunk and said something nasty to me (you would think he is 16?).  So I had decided awhile back that I would be the better person, make sure her day goes smoothly, and only attend the wedding. It truly sucks to not share the entire day with her and she is upset about it as much as I am. In fact the groom’s family is as well. But I know her father (and so does she) and he is stubborn, pigheaded and will pout the entire time if I am there. I don’t want anything to mar her day.  I have to admit, I am nervous about just seeing him at the wedding. If he does say something, I have to be strong and just walk away. Unfortunately that will feed him the anger he likes but I will not ruin her day by commenting back…. Other than a polite “this is her day, let it go”.

 

I know way back when – probably January, I was hoping to be rockin HOT by this time so that I could shove his “fat pig” comment back in his face, but alas, I’ve obviously not tried to lose weight for the right reason as that motivation did not work. See it doesn’t work if you try to do it for someone else, it must be for YOU!!

 

Don’t get me wrong, I am going to look good, I’ve lost a ton of weight since he last saw me, but I just wanted to be a bit lighter. Oh life!

 

I hope you all have a fantastic weekend, I won’t be back online until next Monday.

Ttyl

Sandra

 

MLHAS #9

The following is my update for the Long Hot Active Summer Challenge . I’ve been sick for a couple of weeks and so my exercise hasn’t been as good as it should have been. I did manage to walk while on vacation and had one strength training session using my bands and tubes. Then last night I was back for my two hour workout at the gym – that brought my minutes up J

My weight today is: 184.8

I lost/gained (start 181.9 - last week 183.2)   +1.6 lbs (+2.9 from start)

Minutes exercised June30-Jul 6th: 355 (155 Quality, 180 walking)

This challenge is so not about the weight for me as I’ve just accepted that when my body is ready to dump it, it will. My focus is about increasing and/or keeping my activity minutes up high. And good quality minutes as well. Eventually my body will catch up.

I weigh the same as I did a year ago, actually probably less right now but not by much. But I am a size or more smaller (then 16, now either 12 or 14). That counts for something. It’s not all about the numbers on the scale. I’m letting go of the stress of seeing that number not changing week after week. Up and down 2lbs over a two week period is really nothing for me. Up and down 10lbs is when I would start to worry.

My antibiotics are kicking in and my head and chest feel a bit better. I’m coughing a lot right now as it seems to be loosening up and in some cases I’ve been dry coughing – so that’s a good sign. I felt tired working out last night and probably wasn’t working out as hard as I normally do but I was giving it my best effort. I’ve missed weight training.

I hope you all have a fantastic week!

Ttyl

Sandra

I had to do it!

Went to the doctor's yesterday afternoon and she has put me on some antibiotics. I'm really hoping they will kick in today or tomorrow and get rid of this infection. It is so dragging me down. I'm tired of being tired and no energy to workout. I'm not sure if the pill did this or what but I could not sleep last night. Mr. Sandra came to bed at 11:30 which is very early for him and I was still wide awake. I was for a couple more hours in fact. So at 5, I could barely open my eyes. I've got my session with my PT tonight and considering I haven't seen her in a couple of weeks, she is likely going to kick my butt. I just hope I have enough energy to make it worth while.

After the doc, I went to fill my prescription (which happened to be Walmart) and I headed over to the infant area while I was waiting. A full shopping cart later, I called my son and told him I was coming over - just wouldn't hold her. He laughed at me and was not surprised. I told him I couldn't take it anymore.... I just had to see her :)

So Mr. Sandra got the privilege of holding her while I took some pictures. I have to admit they aren't as good as I would have liked because I didn't bring an extra battery so I was taking them fast as the camera was dieing. I'll be getting better ones later...

Isn't she cute :)

I hope you all have a Fantastic day!

ttyl

Sandra

New Life!

My Son and his GF were expecting their first child, and the Wednesday before I left on Vacation, she was admitted to the hospital 2 weeks before her due date, to induce labor. The small babe and Mom were both losing weight and they wanted her out of her Mom so that they could fatten her up. So two days before I was to leave for the Mountains – with no cell phone access – they were waiting for my little granddaughter to be born.  Since my vacation was planned, scheduled and other people were coming to stay with us, we decided to leave anyway and just keep on checking back when we could. I was stressing out about the entire thing AND had come down this cold. Probably why it had gotten worse.

So on Friday morning, my daughter and I drove to the nearest station which is about 13KM from where we camp. This station has a store, gas, diesel as well as a water and dump station for trailers. Fortunately it also has a pay phone. So I called my son on Friday morning to find out that Lilyana Dawn was born at 7:45p.m. on Thursday night, weighing in at a whopping 4lbs 11 oz and she is 17.5” long. Pretty tiny little thing. Mom and babe are both doing great. They got home on Sunday as they wanted to keep them both in the hospital for a few days for observation.

The picture isn’t a great one – I can’t wait to go see her and take pictures with my camera. When I got home last night, I got on the computer right away looking for pictures and sat there and cried. I feel horrible that I haven’t seen her yet and I don’t plan on it until I feel better. I would not want to just look at her, I’d want to hold and cuddle with her so I’m waiting a few more days before I go just to make sure I’m feeling better and not pass it along to her or her Mom.

When I talked to my son last night, he said that Mom was struggling with a little post partum depression right now but otherwise everything is fine. My son is a natural father, he is comfortable with babies. He might not be so good as they get older, but he is great when they are little. His first child, my 7yr old grandson, when he was first born Aiden’s mom also suffered from post partum depression and could not deal with everything so they split up and he raised Aiden for the first 6 months of his life. They lived with me and I thoroughly enjoyed viewing new life experiences through the eyes of my grandson as a grandmother and not a worrying parent. They eventually got back together for a couple of years but it still didn’t work out for them. They are good friends now and a HUGE part of my life. She may have had a rough start as a mother but she is certainly rocking it now.

My son and his GF are going to struggle in the years to come because of their life situation. It always comes down to finances. But I won’t let them suffer in anyway and will be there with a watchful eye. It’s who I am. I don’t have the room to have them come live with me (they live with her Mom right now) but I won’t allow them to go hungry at all. While she was pregnant, they did frequently come over to eat at my house because I wanted to make sure she was eating right. Even with living with her Mom, it was still room and board type arrangement so they were completely responsible for their own food and stuff. Her Mom could not afford to support them in anyway. In September they need to find a new place to live and I’m already worried about that. My son does not make a large amount of money and it is hard for couples starting out to find places to live that they can afford. He needs to get new employment but that too is not so easy these days. I’ve got my fingers crossed that things work out for them as they need their own place and space to get on with their lives and raise their little girl.

Why do I always feel like I need to take on the weight of my family’s problems on my shoulders J

I hope you all have a FANTASTIC day!

Ttyl

Sandra

Vacation Over…. for now!

I had a nice 10 days out in the middle of no where. Unfortunately I am still sick with that cold that I came down with 2 weeks ago. My sinuses and lungs are infected and so I’m still very stuffed up and coughing a lot. There were a couple of times I felt like I was getting a cold all over again as I was out of sorts a couple of days in the last 10.  Achy and low energy. My body is having a tough time fighting this and I have also broken out with cold sores. When I go down, I go down hard. The only thing that I can think of that put me this low (other than the cold) is because I had stopped exercising about a week before I got sick. Doesn’t make sense to me but it is what it is….

Now I’ve just got to focus on eating right, exercising and getting enough sleep to try to get my body back in perfect health. I think a visit to the doctor is going to have to happen this week as I don’t know of any natural way to clear up sinus infections and if I don’t get on some antibiotics soon, I will have this for another 3 weeks. It’s hard to exercise when you can’t breath and when you do, you just cough.

Here are some pictures from my week:

  This is where I lived for 10 days. There is no service at this campsite so we relied on what the trailer could hold. We were fortunate to almost have the entire lower section of the campground to ourselves once the weekend was over.






This is Kiwi, she is about 4 months old and is a Chesapeake Bay Retriever. She is a very lovely girl and her and Katie are best friends now.  She belongs to Mr. Sandra’s oldest son who came out the first Friday and stayed with us for 4 days. Along with him came his fiancé from Japan and her father who is visiting Canada right now. He stayed in the trailer with us. His English was Ok as long as you spoke fairly slowly. He loved it there and took tons of pictures.

She is pretty much the same size as Katie. We had them tied along ropes between the trees and they could just touch and play. They could run back and forth along the ropes on pulley’s. They had fun.







When there was no one around the campground, I left her off her leash. She was such a good dog. I was very impressed. She barked a few people and dogs but generally just ignored folks. It has been a challenge for us/her to get her used to people.




 

Just a few feet from our campsite was this view. It is such lovely country I live in.  The below picture is where we took Katie for her daily training session.




Because we have had such a wet spring, and a cool one, the Mountains still have some snow on them and we are still experiencing spring run-off. This makes the rivers and creeks swollen, fast and a bit dirty so fly fishing isn’t at its best. But the view is well worth just getting out there.








These scraggly goats can be found on the same stretch of the highway all the time. It doesn’t matter how much traffic is on this highway, they just stay near that center line and force you to go around them. They just stay there licking the roads.












When I had the energy, I tried to walk at least 45 minutes every single day up and down through the campground. Some of the hills were challenging so I felt it was a pretty good walk. A couple of days I took out my tubes and bands outside and did some strength training.

I’m pretty sure I haven’t lost any weight and probably haven’t gained any either so I’m just fine with that. I hope to get up tomorrow morning and get started back at hitting the treadmill and weights. I’ve only got 8 weeks left to get in shape for the Kidney March and so I had better get my butt in shape – and fast!

Hope you enjoyed the views…

ttyl
Sandra

p.s., Happy July 4th my American Friends!